More and more people are coming to see me with issues in their lives which are made worse by feeling low self esteem or self worth. Low self esteem or no self esteem at all is easily dismissed as not being important. But it really does matter.
Having low self- esteem means lacking confidence in yourself or your abilities, and its about the value or worth you place on yourself. If you set yourself impossibly high standards that you cannot live up to, you will inevitably feel a failure, when in fact you may have made great achievements but are not able to recognise them. Some people may experience deep seated self- esteem issues that stem from a lack of emotional support from parents or families, or partners. The person who works hard but is taken for granted by their boss and feels unappreciated will probably have low self- esteem as well.
This really does get in the way of being able to cope with difficult situations. Unless you are really able to understand where it comes from, you may never feel the freedom to truly accept yourself for who you are.
If you find you are putting a “label” on yourself, I’m inadequate, I’m unattractive, I’m unlovable, I’m stupid, I’m worthless and so on, and if you tell yourself these negatives enough times, eventually you will come to identify yourself with that statement and believe it to be true about yourself. Once that belief is in your core system, it will affect how you deal with or react to any situations. If you allow external factors to influence how you rate your self- worth, then your moods are likely to swing between good and bad because that’s the gauge by which you decide if you are a good person or bad one.
Counselling will help with self- esteem issues. Identifying where the problems come from is the first step to changing the future. Hypnotherapy is showing some really positive results in helping people see themselves in a more positive way. I love it when a client feels better about themselves, and feels good enough to say it out loud! Its quite some time ago when I wrote the line “if it matters to you…..then it matters” – but I believe its just as relevant now as it was then.
Have you ever thought about trying to make things better, but told yourself there’s no point in you trying hypnotherapy or counselling, because nobody can help you feel better about your situation? Do you tell yourself that there are people worse off than you, so you should just get on with it? Well, that’s a very powerful way to feel, but its just not true. You do deserve it, and you CAN do it, all you need is the motivation to try, and the support to keep you going. If you bring the first, I have more than enough of the second to get you going!